Trumpiad for today: solar panels are frying animals
Donald Trump has identified yet another threat to American wildlife: solar panels, which he claims are a hundred times hotter than a stove and fry any animal that jumps on them. The president of the United States shared this peculiar energy discovery at a campaign rally in Texas, declaring that the black panels “kill all the animals.” The story so far has not explained why America's entire fauna would be jumping onto solar panels, but in the president's explanations of the world, details rarely stand in the way of the conclusion: whatever is renewable must surely be something terrible.
Wind turbines, of course, also got their share of blame, since according to Trump they freeze up, are extremely expensive, and kill birds — so on the campaign stage, a complete animal-kingdom massacre carried out by renewable energy came together. On the ground, solar panels are frying creatures; in the air, turbines are mowing them down, and American wildlife, it seems, can only hope that the president will lead the country back into the reassuring embrace of oil and natural gas in time.
And that did not take long: Trump announced that he would scrap one of the Biden administration's rules, which would have limited the amount of methane released into the atmosphere during oil and natural gas extraction. According to estimates, the regulation could have prevented the emission of 58 million tons of methane between 2024 and 2038, but the American president's attention is currently occupied by solar panels acting as an imaginary animal grill. In any case, the oil and gas industry is lucky to benefit from this peculiar sensitivity to nature conservation: while Trump worries about animals jumping onto panels, producers get to be rid of the emissions cap.
Fallow ground
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